I often see me floatin, but my shadow it weighs a ton

Hello pretties! Finally a chance to sit down and write properly. Christmas this year, for me at least, was a bit strange. Mainly because I didn't ask for anything. I got presents and everything but even though I didn't ask for a ton of things I didn't really feel disappointed. I think I might be growing up. This sounds rather odd.

I won't lie. When I first started living in college, I had no idea how close we would all get. And especially how close the group of girls I'm 'with' would get. I want to say it's not clique-y because it's not and we aren't nasty or anything, but we are pretty tight. I mean, we have our own secret facebook page. I don't know whether I should have written that lol. But we unofficially decided to send each other cards. I think getting a card almost every day of the week is very exciting, which is what we did. There's nothing like receiving an envelope marked just for you, bearing written goodies and delights. It's cute too, each card is so like the person who sent it.

I got 'Inglourious Basterds' off my cousin and I watched it the other day with my sister. I really liked it, despite the fact that it's quite different to the things I usually choose to watch.

Question: I assume the word celebrities is derived from the word celebrate/ celebrated, so if we don't follow/ care about celebrities, what could potentially happen? Entire industries would collapse - a substantial portion of the fragrance world, the tabloid and magazines, shows like E-news and quite possibly Perez Hilton's blog (who would then subsequently be unable to afford his lascivious, greasy lifestyle and crawl away to die in a whole WITHOUT hair product in his hair or concealer pasted all over his face). Wow. What a loss.

Now I'm going to talk about a new film, called "The Runaways" which is a biopic on the teenage girl band of the 70's. It's got Dakota Fanning and Kristen Stewart in it. And as long as I don't wax lyrical about the personal lives of the two, I'm not being a hypocrite. It looks really good and I'm so excited it's actually coming out.

Hope everyone had a lover-ly Christmas

i don't want a lot for Christmas, there is just one thing i need

I will write again sooonish! But for now, I will post pictures instead.

My shopping haul!! Except the singlet I got was stripey not cream coloured. And I am proud to say it didn't feel like I was kicking my savings account. (It has taken a beating this year. If it were a child, I would be in jail for sure. I'm not really sure whether that was an appropriate metaphor.)

Christmas is almost here! So get cracking!

I'm gonna rain on your parade

Let's play a game. A simple, simple game. It's called, "Spot The Difference".

Here are some clues

1. The first item, for those unaware of the services provided by such a device, is a Hello Kitty toilet paper dispenser machine.

2. Both things pictured above basically enlist the help of paper to clean up shit. Supposedly anyway.

3. Both basically benefit the wealthy and already well to do. Let's face the facts, poor people do not need a toilet paper dispenser emblazoned with an iconic Japanese cat nor do they need a yearly convention orchestrated for the wealthy to go on another, unnecessary holiday where nothing is achieved.

ANSWER: The pink one actually does what it sets out to do and succeeds

i love you, even when i'm sleeping

I usually have something to say about everything. But this just scares me. Kate Moss actually said that somewhere online.

it's all inside

You're looking at this and you're already rolling your eyes, because it's one of those posts. Well, it kind of is.

It's been a long, funny week. My uncle passed away on Saturday. I still haven't cried and I think there must be something wrong. I think it's because I haven't been home yet.

I've spent pretty much the entire week with my friend. We've been to beach so many times I only have a white colored bikini of normal skin left now and to see New Moon, to coffee, dinner, we invited people over for a barbecue and sat on a balcony practically overlooking the city just talking into the night. I saw the guy I had been with during college for the first time in almost a month yesterday. It's easy to say the feelings are completely spent and nonexistent when someone isn't around but as soon as they're there again. Not that I'm saying I'll go there again. It takes too long to get over some people. It feels so sappy and I can feel myself cringing and laughing inside at my self when I step back and look at it all.

It was so weird seeing him in person again. We both acted normal. I don't really know how else to act anyway. My friends have told me I will get over him, that I'll find someone new and better. I really did laugh though when I saw him at the barbecue and somehow ended up looking at his shoes and realised that he was wearing a pair of my socks to which he was probably completely oblivious to.

I wish that without me your heart would break

I wish that without me you'd be spending the rest of your nights awake

I wish that without me you couldn't eat I wish

I was the last thing on your mind before you went to sleep

this love's got me blind

I can't help myself

Now we could talk

But the words would come out wrong

And there is no black or white

But still, we just move on

And you're never gonna be the same

from this moment you'll rise

to a height only gained by a compromise

share the glimpse of a new beginning

And now you've changed

But just a small part of me believes this

In my head I repeat our conversations
Over and over til they feel like hallucinations
You know me - I love to lose my mind
And every time andybody speaks your name I still feel the same
I ache, I ache, I ache inside

These images are in the exact order I want them to appear. This last picture is an artwork by Amie Dicke. Candles have always symbolized for me continuity (?) because you can light one and a little bit of wax disappears. The next time you light it, it still gives light but looks slightly different. Like how people can keep on loving, even if you get a bit more melted each time. Short and melted away isn't necessarily bad either.

In another respect, candles also turn up at birthdays and anniversaries. I remember a stupid line in Greek, where it supposedly takes "however long you've been with someone to get over them". I agree and disagree with this at the same time.

I can't say this will be the very last post of this kind yet. The last post exploring chartered territory in a sense because it's not like people haven't written about this kind of thing before and even more eloquently so. I feel like I have a bit more self pity and wallowing to do yet. But rest assured I am not the 'eat my feelings', crying, mopey, sleeping for an entire week (a la Carrie Bradshaw) or drunk dialling, scorned woman. Not in any way whatsoever but these things tend to take time. That's not to say I'm not the 'get drunk and then talk about my feelings' type who makes a million break up playlists in iTunes and still can't help talking about him. I daresay I revealed a little too much in that previous line.

How fleeting we are

Kübler-Ross model

Stages

1. Denial — "I feel fine."; "This can't be happening, not to me."
   Denial is usually only a temporary defense for the individual. This feeling is generally replaced with heightened awareness of situations and individuals that will be left behind after death.
2. Anger — "Why me? It's not fair!"; "How can this happen to me?"; "Who is to blame?"
   Once in the second stage, the individual recognizes that denial cannot continue. Because of anger, the person is very difficult to care for due to misplaced feelings of rage and envy. Any individual that symbolizes life or energy is subject to projected resentment and jealousy.
3. Bargaining — "Just let me live to see my children graduate."; "I'll do anything for a few more years."; "I will give my life savings if..."
   The third stage involves the hope that the individual can somehow postpone or delay death. Usually, the negotiation for an extended life is made with a higher power in exchange for a reformed lifestyle. Psychologically, the person is saying, "I understand I will die, but if I could just have more time..."
4. Depression — "I'm so sad, why bother with anything?"; "I'm going to die . . . What's the point?"; "I miss my loved one, why go on?"
   During the fourth stage, the dying person begins to understand the certainty of death. Because of this, the individual may become silent, refuse visitors and spend much of the time crying and grieving. This process allows the dying person to disconnect oneself from things of love and affection. It is not recommended to attempt to cheer up an individual who is in this stage. It is an important time for grieving that must be processed.
5. Acceptance — "It's going to be okay."; "I can't fight it, I may as well prepare for it."
   This final stage comes with peace and understanding of the death that is approaching. Generally, the person in the fifth stage will want to be left alone. Additionally, feelings and physical pain may be non-existent. This stage has also been described as the end of the dying struggle.

can you stay up for the weekend, till next year?

Power dressing!!! Woooooh, what an epiphany! No, not the pink monstrosity above (although, if I came across anyone dressed like that I'd probably give them what they wanted.) but how women dress in the workplace, despite it's fickleness seems to be relatively important. I've been thinking about majors lately and I'm just going to write it down, because I need to put it down somewhere. I'm going to major in economics and marketing or international business and Chinese studies. Then I'm going to find a job so I can power dress the pants off everyone.

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Mumford & Sons do a delicious cover of Calvin Harris' song "I'm Not Alone", it sounds like their own, throw in the banjo and his amazing voice. Their entire album is fantabulous. Go and listen to "Sigh No More".

I found this dress yesterday at a thrift store but I didn't buy it!! I don't know what I was thinking either, it was only $8.00!!!!

This dietary pyramid is based on one of my guy friends. It's a great way to sum up someone I think.

I've had a strangeish kind of week. I failed another one of my classes, namely maths, so I am yet to get through an entire semester without failing something, I've spent the week with one of my good friends and her sister which has been so much fun and I've finished off 3 series of Greek.

And Christmas will be upon us soon!!!